friday's confession

{Note: I do realize that this week's friday's confession is coming out on saturday. Busy, I've been busy. But now you get to enjoy a new post on a saturday! Hello, bright side! Happy weekend everyone!)

I'm funny. No, really, I am. 

Sometimes, my blog seems sooo serious to me. So much to think about, to work on, to pay attention to. But, in reality, the non-blogger me is fun. And funny.

For some reason, I can't seem to find my humor in my writing. Perhaps it's because I'm just starting to find my voice, find myself in my writing. Perhaps it's because I take what I'm writing about so very seriously. It is my life, after all.

But, I'm going to work on lightening up. Becoming more like the real me. Finding that funny with words, that's my challenge. In person, humor is all about the timing, the delivery. It's me saying something completely outrageous and the looking at the people around me with a huge smile and raised eyebrows, as if to say, "oh come on, you know you were thinking it too." And then they laugh, relieved, because they didn't have to be the ones to say it. In person, sarcasm is funny. In writing, it's mean.

Fellow writers -- a question for you: how do you find humor in your work? Any tips for a novice? 

letting go

 

I think that sometimes, actually often, I have a hard time letting go of things. I want to control, control, control, because that's what's safe. That's what I know. If I am in control, I know what to expect, where things are going:there are no surprises.

But, ugh, how boring is a life without surprises? How boring is a life where I have to be the one to make all the decisions, make everything happen? How boring is a life wherein I'm so set on things happening my way, the way things are planned, that I'm not open to see other opportunities, other chances at complete bliss?

People say that life is what happens when you're busy making other plans. They say that you'll meet the right person for you when you least expect it, that the perfect job will make it's way to you when you are looking the other way. I have experienced all of these situations, and I think that the thing they have in common is that I had let go of my control.

A little over two years ago, I was ready for a new job. I was in the midst of interviewing with a high profile consulting firm for a position that would have made me miserable when, on a whim, I checked nonprofit job postings on craigslist. And I found the job I have now. When I read the ad, I knew that the job was mine, and I got the job. So while I’ve since decided that it isn't the right place for me in the future, I am 100% certain that it was the right place for me at the time, a stepping stone to help guide me to a lot of really amazing things and to a lot of really amazing people.

About 18 months ago, I was on track to apply for some prestigious MBA programs. I had everything together. I was going to go into Business, whatever that meant. And then I stopped. I said no. And I let go of control. And I've never looked back.  

Shortly after deciding that business school wasn't for me, I joined my mom for an evening of sailing to benefit a local nonprofit sailing program. I was tired, had worked a long day and wasn't feeling "on," but I went anyway and met Tim. I am so grateful for him everyday, and amazed that I found him when I least expected it.

These three experience highlight what I know, but what is so hard for me to really accept and put into play day by day.  Here they are. I hope that they are helpful to you:

Let go. Be open. Experience things as they happen. Stop being afraid of the unknown, and experience what the universe gives you. And then experience it again. And again. And welcome what happens next.

Photo credit: mylerdude

wednesday's inspiration

I was recently inspired by this blog post on decor8.  Holly writes about "late bloomers," creative types who come into their talent, or find their way later on. Not later on, later on, but at points in their lives when the conservative folk would rather they go to work every day and count beans until retirement hits.  These are people who don't realize their creative talents until they're at a point in their lives when they're supposed to "have their acts together." I realize that the term late bloomer is a bit of a misnomer: we aren't exactly talking golden girls here!

Kelly Rae Roberts was the subject of Holly's post. Kelly Rae found her talent, her art, her inspiration when she was 30 (older than me! there's hope! whoo hoo!) and she's amazing. She's found phenomenal success as a textile artist and just released her first book.

Here's one of her works, a favorite of mine. It's called Leap Fearlessly and is available at Kelly Rae's etsy shop.

This is a woman whose work I admire and whose message I hold dear to my own heart. She speaks of gratitude and owning it. It's like she's in my head sometimes! So, today, I choose to be inspired by Kelly Rae Roberts. Looking at her works moves me, and I know that one day her book will do the same (btw, how do you balance trying to curb your spending to save up for an awesome adventure when there's so much cool stuff out there?). I hope that it moves you too.

And for those of you who think that living your dream is unattainable because you're too old or too far along in your career or have too many other responsibilities, I say it's never too late. I say go now and do it. Find it. And start living it. You will realize that a life is possible beyond what you have ever imagined.

just do it!

How often do you think of doing something kind for someone else, but never follow through with actually doing it? How often do you think, "oh, it would be really nice to <send that person a card/call that person and tell her I miss her/invite that person out to dinner>" but then you never do? Even simpler, how often do you want to compliment someone on something, but hold back?

Why do we do this? What keeps us from following through on our really good intentions? Why is it so hard to find time in our so-busy lives to even take a few minutes to write a quick note to someone? Why is it so hard sometimes to just tell someone that they look nice or that you appreciated something kind that they did for you?

I think that there are two main culprits at play:

1.  No one has any time for anything. I am working on slowing down -- I think you'll all be hearing about this a lot in the coming weeks. I always find myself rushing from place to place, my mind always on what needs to happen next. I never take the time to slow down and enjoy the moment I'm in. I think that this is part of why I have a hard time with follow through, why I can never seem to find the time to bring my good intentions to fruition. 

2.  Doing kind things for others, even just paying a simple compliment requires confidence in ourselves. It requires us to trust that the kindness will be well-received. There have been times when I've found myself wanting to compliment someone, but I decide that they most likely aren't concerned about my opinion. "She's super cool already, why would she care that I really like her dress?" "Of course he knows he's a good writer, why should I tell him what he already knows?"

But here's the thing -- everyone I know enjoys compliments. How about you? Studies have shown that positive reinforcement is a tremendous motivator.  And, it feels good to compliment people. As I said before, it's nice to be nice. 

So, I'd like to issue a challenge to you, my lovely blog readers: be nice. For one week, follow through on every kind act that you think about doing. Whether it's helping someone across the street, giving up your seat to someone on the bus, or simply making eye contact with someone and saying "thank you," be nice. Follow through. Do it. For one week, don't let your I'm-to-busy-to-send-that-thank-you-card way of thinking get the best of you. 

Maybe you'll have to turn the television off early. Maybe you'll have to read a few less blogs (omg!). And maybe you'll be surprised. Maybe you'll find that acting on kindness feels amazing, like something you want to keep doing. 

I'll be doing this challenge too. I promise, a full report will follow! 

Photo credit: revjim5000

friday's confession

I really want to be French. I love all things French -- Amelie, the Eiffel Tower, the Tour de France, even the snarky attitudes of Parisians!

I even read French blogs. Well, I suppose read is a strong word. Let me rephrase: I even look at photos on French blogs and try to understand what they're saying. I can usually recall about one out of every four words. Sometimes I wonder if I'm looking at what-not-to-wear/gofugyourself-type blogs where the bloggers are saying how awful things look.  But I know that can't be; everything's so beautiful! Seriously, spend some time here and then tell me that French people aren't awesome!

Tim and I are planning to go to Paris in the spring. Doesn't that sound romantic? Paris in the springtime? Our plan is to spend a couple weeks in the city and then explore the rest of the country for another couple of weeks.

In the meantime, I'm stuck at my day job, trying to get the most out of the opportunity I've been given. But, make no mistake, even though I'm being optimistic about staying in the day job, I'm still keeping my eye on the prize: inspiration. And creativity. I suppose that's more than one prize, but no worries. I'm thinking of getting myself one of these mobiles to help motivate me and keep me inspired when I start feeling like all I want to do is lay on the couch and watch tv.

So, this is my prize. And, this is what I'm going to get to remind myself that things are changing. That ball is rolling. My future is happening. And, I'm on my way. Tim says that if I want to be French, I have to start eating my fries with mayonaisse. I'm hoping that they'll let me take a pass on that one!

PS Thoughts and ideas on where to go in France are always welcome and appreciated! I've been to Paris one other time for a long weekend, and Tim's never been. Please help lead us astray!

(Mobile from Spin Designs)

wednesday's inspiration

I came across these posters via Design is Mine. I think they're awesome. Frank Chimero is an awesome designer -- and funny too!

This one tends to sum up what I think a lot of us feel about "finding our passion."

We want to find it, we know it's a good thing, but -- holy crap -- it's scary. It can lead to glorious things, but what if it doesn't? What if I find my passion, have a job that I'm crazy about, that I sing about, and still I'm unfulfilled? Do you ever have these doubts? Usually when I do it's because I'm feeling insecure about things, unsure about my decisions.

So I trust. I trust myself to make my own best decisions. I trust the voice inside that says that I can be happy. That I can live a fulfilling life that will bring me good things. And I trust that I can make it happen for myself. That I am in control of my future. That my instincts are right for me.

This one is fantastic! It makes me think of the advice that you need to figure out what it is that you do that you get lost in. That you can do for hours, without getting bored or needing to move onto other things. That passion is what brings about true productivity. That really gets things done. If only we could all be so passionate about everything we do! If only I could be so passionate about cleaning!

what's beyond your comfort zone?

A dear friend recently did something very brave. She went to a luncheon attended by a group of artists with someone she barely knew. She's an artist, but is just beginning to start her crafting business. Her acquaintance invited her to this luncheon so that she could meet other artists in her community. But she only knew two people. And she didn't even know them well. So, she had to mingle and put herself out there and talk to other artists. And it went beautifully. But, it was hard.

When she told me about it, I asked, "Weren't you nervous?" I'm sure that if I was put into a similar situation I would have been so nervous. And she was. She said that she felt a little awkward at first, but then just started going up to people and introducing herself. She pushed through her discomfort. And gained many new contacts and friends from the experience.

How often do you not do something because you're concerned about being uncomfortable? Or you don't want to put yourself into an awkward situation? What kind of opportunities could you find if you pushed through your comfort zone into the world?

I know that I have missed out on opportunities because I haven't wanted to make an effort, or be "on." But, if we all were willing to deal with the uncomfortable situations and see what may come from them, I think we would all be better off.

The next time you feel shy or find yourself avoiding a situation that you know would benefit you, try to realize the reasons why. Focus on your discomfort. Acknowledge it. And the get beyond it. Push it aside and keep going. You might be surprised at what you find on the other side.

Photo credit: visualdensity

friday's confession

Happy Friday everyone! I'm afraid I don't have a mind-shattering, lesson-teaching confession for you all today. No, this is more of a funny little secret of mine.

Whenever I'm in an elevator with strangers, I always try to imagine what would happen if it got stuck. I usually try to figure out which of my fellow passengers will be the panickers and which ones will be my new life-long friends. I imagine us sitting around on a front porch when we're older saying, "Wow, just imagine if that elevator hadn't gotten stuck that day. We never would have known each other."

And then I wonder who will freak out when someone (read:me) has to pee in the corner.

I hope you all have a fantastic long weekend and are able to get outside and enjoy what's left of summer!