Like many of us, I’ve fallen down the rabbit hole of Serial.
But this post isn't about who I think did it or who I don't think did it. It's about what by my ability (or inability) to listen to a 45-minute podcast says about my life.
First, I can’t listen to it while I’m watching the girls (or driving them anywhere) because there are random curse words. And we’re trying to watch that habit before it’s too late.
Second, I can’t listen while I’m working because I end up missing everything and having to re-listen. And that also means that I’m not focusing on my work.
Third, I can’t listen while I’m making dinner with Tim because he has stubborn ethical objections to the sensationalizing of a tragedy (which could be discussed in another blog post. Or not.) and makes a ruckus out of it. So, it’s just easier not to.
I therefore find myself offering to go to the grocery store just to have 14 minutes (round-trip) of solo silence in which to listen to a small snippet of the latest episode.
The episodes are released early Thursday mornings. At the writing of this post, it is more than 48 hours post-release of Episode 11, and I’ve been able to listen to 24 minutes.
Because that is how I live my life right now. There is always something tugging at my arm - a baby, a husband, a dog, a client, a collaborator, a dishwasher. Or at least that's how it can feel at times. Like I'm always being pulled and tugged and needed. There is always something that needs tending to.
Except: this is the life that I have created for myself. And the tugging doesn't have to be a burden when it really is a blessing.
This is a life where I am lucky and grateful to have such happy, engaged babies and such a loving, funny, stubborn husband. I’m lucky to have a sweet dog who is healthy and energetic. And clients who are engaged and curious and ready for more; collaborators who I’m excited about working with, who generate ideas that cannot be ignored. I’m even lucky to have a magic box that I can put all of my dirty dishes into, and after a few hours, they are clean.
I could begrudge all of this. I could bemoan how long it takes me to listen to the latest episode, feel left out of the global conversations about the show that are happening on Facebook, wonder why can’t I play too? when I have to scroll past posts so as to avoid spoilers.
Or I could say, Hey. It’s fine. It’s just a podcast. That isn’t going anywhere. What’s the hurry?
Our lives are so wholly convenient right now. We have groceries delivered to our front porch. I get a shipment of diapers every three weeks so that we never run out. And yet, we are more frazzled than ever.
Because of things like this. Of trying to keep up. Of wanting to be picked and sit with the cool kids at the lunch table and participate.
But are we forsaking participation in our actual lives for a spot at the cool kids’ table in the cafeteria?
And do the cool kids even have anything to offer? Besides gossip and a boost to our egos?
Is there any reframing you need to do in your life starting now?
**graphic by Erin Cassidy for Tiffany Han Coaching
PS. Heads up! I'm having a special buy 3, get 1 free calendar sale on my 2015 Sparkle & Shine calendar. The last day to order for pre-Christmas shipping is December 17.