on giving up gossip
Inspired by the lovely Jessica of lovepuppy, I decided to remove gossip from my life for 40 days. That means no perezhilton (I would link, but in the spirit of giving up gossip, it's best that I don't open the site), no gofugyourself, no "did you hear?" whispers.
I like gossip. I have always said that celebrity gossip is like my porn, my dirty secret. I like being in the know. I like being the person that folks can go to when they're wondering what the story is with so-and-so.
But, it's the gossip in my personal life that's really gotten me down. It's when the bad side, the mean side of me comes out that I just eat up the gossip. I've realized that it's also when the insecure side of me comes out. And, that's not good. I have found that whenever I gossip, afterward, I feel a bit empty inside and don't really like the person that I am capable of being. When I'm doing the gossiping, I feel great, alive, but afterward, it's no good.
So, I'm stopping. No more until Easter. It's been tough, but I haven't slipped up once on the celebrity stuff. I've even been averting my eyes at the grocery store check-out lines. I can't say that I've been as good on the personal stuff. I'm still trying to draw the line between gossip and just finding out about how other people are/what they're up to. I think the line stands at judgment, what kind of judgment I attach to the information.
It's a process, a transition, but I'm hoping to come out of all of this a better person, a person who doesn't need to talk about others in order to make herself feel better. A person who can live her life with her own standards instead of feeling the need to compare herself to others.
And you know what? So far, it's been a whole lot easier than I thought it would be.