I was so excited when Ashley of Your Super Awesome Life reached out and asked me to be a part of her What I Wish I Knew series in which amazing women (including yours truly!) share what we wished we'd known back in our teens.
Of course I said yes to this opportunity and am writing today about what I wish I'd know about rejection. Oh my, there's so much to tell...
We hit it off. We made out. I was smitten.
After meeting Adam, I proceeded to spend so much time trying so hard - so so hard - trying to get him to like me. If only he'd realize how (pretty/smart/funny/sexy) I was, he'd be smitten too.
Dear lord, y'all, I tried so hard. *Shocker* it didn't work. After a while, Adam made it clear that he wasn't interested in me and proceeded to fall for a girl who lived in the dorm next door. A girl who'd just been herself the whole time.
Ironically, my quest to not being rejected led to my being rejected. Because I was Trying. And what matters/gets the boy/lets you shine isn't how hard you try, it's how true you are, how you show up in this world.
It's the being, not the doing, that counts.
What I wish I'd known was that rejection doesn't matter. We are all rejected and accepted every day, all the time. We spend so much time avoiding rejection that we forget to really live and truly BE.
The BEING is where the magic is. It's what makes us our most amazing selves. It's what makes us shine.
What I wish I'd known is that someday there is a person, many persons actually, who will love me (ALL OF ME!) for every piece of my being: the good, the bad, and the crazy.
If you're there, back in that if only he'd like me place, have faith that your day will come too. Whether you find your faith in a book, in the Bible, in your mom, or in the comfort of that good friend, trust it.
Trust that you will get there, to that place where you show up every day as your most beautiful self and say "Fuck 'em all" to the ones who don't want a piece of your sparkle.
And you will shine one, oh sweet one, you will shine on, like the bright, crazy diamond that you are. And the ones who are smart enough to stick around will be blinded by your light.